I've been wondering lately.
Before I was too afraid, but now I have to ask...

What do you see when you look at me?

Do you see a baby who thinks she is so much older then she really is? You know, I have grown up fast.

Do you see that little girl, so young and confused. "She's just lost," you may say, "She'll find herself soon, I know she will."

Do you see a rebel? Someone who has to argue or object. I just can't agree or follow the normal path, can I?

Maybe, just MAYBE you see that girl that you want to see. "She's perfect... only a little different, but that's okay. She does what we want, what we've always wanted. Trust?" you ask, "not an issue. We trust her in everything she does."

... Ha, who am I kidding.

Or lastly, do you see a teenage girl who knows who she is? She knows what she wants, and she doesn't care what people think. A girl who is happy with her life even when you, being on the outside looking in, don't understand some of it.

Well, I am that girl.
I finally figured out what I want. I know my friends, my grades, my music, my thoughts. Finally it all makes sense.

You don't like it, but you don't have to like it.
You disagree with most of it, and that's okay with me.
... But did I disappoint you?
Did you have high hopes for me?
... are they gone?
Do you wish I was something different?
... something better, perhaps?

Well I'm sorry to tell you, but this is what you get.
This is who I am.

No one; not you, or them, or anyone can change that.
...No one but me.

I'm not scared anymore.
I'm not afraid of what you'll do, say, or even what you'll think.
I still wonder, but I think that I always will.

Now, you don't have to trust me.
You don't have to like my friends.
You don't have to admit that I'm not like you wanted.
You don't have to let me be independent... Sure, tell me what to do.
You don't have to listen to me.
You don't have to help me.
You don't have to agree with me.
You don't even have to like me.

But this is me.



... and all I ask is that you love me.