I've never been in a situation like this. And I know that there's really no situation anymore. Well... if thats how it is for you, I understand. but for some reason, I can't just forget.
It still bothers me.
It bothers me how we ended because of how we were.
Why didn't we ever see each other? If it was completely my fault, just tell me that. Maybe it will help.
And if you want me to stop bothering you, tell me that, too.
But its comforting to go back and read things that we wrote about/to each other. It makes me feel like there's still hope for something like that to happen again.
I hate this, because I would give anything to just go back to two years ago. December, two years ago. When I first said I love you.
That was my favorite feeling in the world.
I'm sorry. Every time I bring this up, you seem angry... which is understandable. I mean, you probably are angry. Because I know that its too late. and I know that I should have said all of this when you felt the way that you did... but I couldnt make myself say it then, so I figured that late is better than never.
and I dont think I would be able to hold this in forever.
I guess that's it...I just miss you and I miss the way things were and I'm sorry that I'm telling you now, but its is the soonest that I could make myself do it.
I knew you would understand. Of course you understand. You know how hard it can be to say things and sometimes it takes a long time to spit it out. I'm so glad you're not angry. and i know that you were at one point. I'm sorry about that. and I'll try not to feel bad if you ever get upset. I'll try to remember that you're not upset at what i did, but what you didn't do. and you're so right... we both should have been more straightfoward and honest. we had never had a problem with that before. "don't let anything i do get you down, it's never my intention. Same to you, lovely.
as far as us, now... there's always hope. but i think it's unfair to both of us to string it along seeing as how were so far apart. i'd love to see you sometime soon though if you have time off this vacation, we should definately see each other at some point.
i love you, i'll always love you, but things have happened in a weird way. i think all we can do is play it by ear and see what happens. i mean it when i say i'd love to see you again though. feel free to call me whenever."
I can't keep this to myself.
because the quotation marks are unnecessary.
