Do you think that you could you keep me safe while I still have fun??
... my kind of fun.

Is that okay with you? because in reality, that's what I want more than anything.

I need you there, but I'm not okay with you getting angry or upset with me when I do something that you would rather me not do.
I never put myself in situations that I don't think I'll be able to handle. I promise.

I really, really, really promise.
You see, there used to be a few people that I could say knew me better then I know myself. but that's not even true anymore... so I can handle what I make for myself. I know that I can. Because I know me now; better then I used to. much better, in fact.

You say that I don't give myself enough credit, and many times I'm sure you're right... I don't.
But just try to stick with me on this one.

*I could never lie to you.* Yet, don't forget that your opinion does and always will have an affect on me.

That's me in the corner.


......................That's me in the spotlight,
loosing my religion.

"Remember when we needed each other?
The best of friends like 'sister and brother' that's his cue. ;)
We understood that we'd never be alone.

Those days are gone, and I want you so much...
The night is long and I need your touch.
I don't know what to say... I never meant to feel this way.
But I just don't want to be alone tonight.


I'm falling so hard, so fast this time...
What did I say, what did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?

'It has to be tonight'
But I just need you to know... everything.
I don't want to say goodbye.
I want to spend the rest of my life knowing you."


*Simple... like that* And though you may not agree, I can't help it. Give me your strength?

Angry... only to get angrier and angrier.

Easily annoyed to say the least. Not to mention, pretty damn annoying with all the attitude.
Bitchy.

A downright ass, if you will.

and helpless.
*I hate this.*

A long, long time ago...

littlewatka: damnit i miss you.
KmmyLou86: :-(
KmmyLou86: i miss you too
KmmyLou86: i miss home....i mean your home that i like to think is mine
KmmyLou86: i miss cooper
littlewatka: sorry to add depression to the situation haha
littlewatka: haha
littlewatka: he misses you too.
littlewatka: i love him.
KmmyLou86: and i miss real eggs the eggs here come froma carton of liquid eggs and i said u know my cousins have chickend running around the yard
KmmyLou86: people laughed
KmmyLou86: i told them i wasnt lying
littlewatka: liquid eggs?!
KmmyLou86: and i miss playing bouncyball pingpong
littlewatka: ME TOO!
KmmyLou86: cuz matt bought me 4 bouncy balls the other day
littlewatka: HOLY EFFER THAT WAS THE MOST FUN WE MIGHT HAVE EVER HAD!
KmmyLou86: and it reminded me of you
littlewatka: aaww!!
KmmyLou86: YA IT WAS!
KmmyLou86: or running on the tredmill just cuz it was new and exciting even tho it was below zero
littlewatka: ahahaha YES!!!!!!!!!!!
KmmyLou86: and dont even leave me alone on one of those...cuz it could be trouble
littlewatka:HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHH
KmmyLou86: and i miss walking up your stairs...THE Stairs, cuz they're the only ones in the house...and skipping the squeeky one
KmmyLou86: and i miss your mommy's cooking
KmmyLou86: and loo loo's chilli
KmmyLou86: and walking in to christinas room and just sitting watching her perfectness
KmmyLou86: and i miss talking to you all night
KmmyLou86: and watching a movie but having u say goodnight b4 the previews were even over...cuz i always fall asleep
littlewatka: haha yea!!! and i love that i knew you would fall asleep everytime without fail.
KmmyLou86: i just miss you all so much.
littlewatka: *sigh.
littlewatka: i miss you too.. a whole bunch.
KmmyLou86: and it makes me sad knowing that itll be a lot diff the next time i come home
littlewatka: yea. that is sad.
littlewatka: i hate that
littlewatka: i hate change, but its necessary.
KmmyLou86: ya
KmmyLou86: ur right
KmmyLou86: u were right the 1st time u ever said it too
littlewatka: heh. i know ;-) :-)
littlewatka: and i knew it then :-)
KmmyLou86: u always know...
KmmyLou86: o and heth
KmmyLou86: i miss singing in the closet :-D


That's my girl.

I want to sit next to a boy in the back of a car. and turn to him just a little bit. and get a small peck on the lips. Then I will look at him looking at me and I will smile. he smiles, too. I want to appreciate that kiss even though it is not a rare occurence. We will sit so that our arms touch because I am sitting in the middle. Someone else is sitting to my left. I want to turn to that person and see them smiling back at me. because they know what it's like to be in love.


*My lips are so lonely.*

Amen to something a pretty little girl by the name of Beeb said a long time ago...



*I'm so [worn out] that if someone were to step on me, I'd go pfhhhhhhhhhhh..........*

She never walks blindly into a test...
but I wouldn't be at all surprised to see her walk blindly into a closed door.
No pun intended with the "blindness." ;)
heh.

*My clumsy little genious.*

"What's uuup?" he asks in his I'm-tired-but-in-a-good-mood voice.

"Noooothin," she replies in her playful, I-like-talking-to-you voice and plops herself, very comfortably onto the bed. "When did you do this?" she asks, looking around the room.

"A few weeks ago," he says.

Woah, I havent been here in forever. (That's her thought.)

"Wanna chill down here for a while?" he asks. or something to that effect.
"We figured that since you were here, we would invite you down."

Well, it was nice of you to think of me; I'm satisfied. (another one of her thoughts.)
"Sure," she answered, "I'll stay here for a while... plus, I'm sure they won't miss me too much up there." ;)
*BEEP*... a text. Yep, she wouldn't be missed upstairs at all for a little while.

Good, some time down here won't be too bad at all. In fact, I think it will be kind of nice. (and with this thought, she giggled a little to herself. But enough to make him look over. And to that, she smiled.)
And so the night continued.
Talking and giggling.
Eating and laughing.
Knocking things over and rolling eyes because he knew that was going to happen.
Sleeping and mumbling. ("Don't.") ;)

Sighing and knowing that everything is going to end up okay.
Because even though nights like this don't happen all the time, the important thing is that they can happen when the situation presents itself.

Plus, if they were to happen on a regular basis, I wouldn't appreciate it half as much. (just another little thought.)

It wasn't really even a night to remember. Just a night that will be remembered.
But it was nice.


*And everything is going to end up okay.* Not a thought of hers, it's just the end.

"Goodnight, teary. My pretty petal girl."


*I love you.*

I feel it coming back. But I thought that was over.
Everything... all at the same time. and as of right now, I'm not okay with that.
everything. just everything.


*are you home, baby?* Because I need you now.

I miss our new, but oh-so constant routine.
and I miss singing in the car at the top of our lungs.
and I miss knowing that if you were in the backseat on one of those wonderful trips, you would make yourself sad and end up crying.
and I miss going over to that god-awful house everyday just because we could. (of course, we loved the people there, too.)
and I miss being rebelous together. On many occasions. ;)
and I miss spontaneous sleep-overs with french fries and no sleep.
and I miss watching movies together.
and I miss talking for hours.
and I miss getting ready to go out even if we were just going [almost] next door.
and I miss going out to dinner. Just us.

We are comfortable around eachother.
and we were together so much in those couple weeks that I made the decision that we could easily live together. Haha, I sound like I want to get married... but you know what I mean.
I just miss us a lot.
I got used to it being "us" and not "me."
It was "we" instead of "I".

and I loved it that way.

But the time for change has once again rolled to our door and knocked. although this time, it did barge in rather abruptly.

There is always room for new routines.

*I love you.*